Let us part
by Tanato
Summary: When Jet finds himself in a fight with Clive, he decides to leave. Can Clive turn him around? ::Warning:: SAi Chapter 14 up
1. Intro

Blazing above the wasteland sands, the sun poured down devastating heat, frustrated were those who were forced to live in such a place. It was as if hell had came up and tried to scathe and burn the earth away of all life it contained. Most of the people who lived upon the planet remained inside on days like this. With the earth dieing below their feet, it felt as if there could be nothing done yet to grieve for their upcoming loss. How easily hope was given up, and how some suffered endlessly due to the way destiny traveled. Hope yet, was one of the least things lost for some. It just took a matter of time to realize that, and perhaps for someone to show that.

Panting heavily, a lone traveler couldn't take the heat or his injuries from battles from earlier before anymore. The day was so long, and without water, food, or anything to heal with, it just made it easier for his body to want to give up. Whipping sweat away form his forehead, he just felt as if he could die here and now. No one cared, he was alone, and that's how he always wished to be. Scarves were randomly discarded to stop himself from over heating, however each step he took, it became harder to walk. Finally he collapsed onto his knees panting heavily. Breathes becoming shorter and harder to pull out from his body he knew this was the end for himself. The silver haired boy just painted heavily, a mixture of sweat and blood dripping from his body upon the burning sands of the wasteland.

Taking his canteen from his side, once again he tried to get some water from it; the only hope he had was nothing but dust. Sitting back, he stayed there unable to move anymore from his exhaustion. "Am I going to die?" He asked himself. It were only a day since he left Virginia, Gales, and Clive, and he were already seeming to fade away faster than his memories that never existed. He didn't wish to regret it, and he was looking back at leaving them. If only this were some horrible dream and he could wake up soon. Then at least he could have someone to sit near, to watch, to listen to. That was all gone now, and it seemed he were to loose more than them.

A simple note left at the inn was his farewell to them, nothing more. They meant nothing to him, didn't they? That's what he believed, what he wished to be true, however his feelings were struggled and he was confused. It was a fight that mainly drove him away. The harsh words from the married man singed into his mind. It was the first thing that had for a long time. 'Heartless coward...' The boy thought over this, and what it meant to him. Always running away from his problems, never speaking of them to anyone and trying to keep to himself that is how he lived and what he hated. He hated himself more than everything. Clive only had tried to pull that out of the boy so he may admit it and finally recover.

Darkness started to play its role to his sight, everything blurring, spinning. The world was becoming empty except for what crept upon him. Collapsing in the hot desert, there would usually be no help for a traveler in this situation. His vision playing games with him. Unable to stir, he could watch everything go by for hours, his body feeling more like hell each moment he breathed. Breathes were becoming shorter, more into gasps for survival. Why couldn't someone come along to put him out of his misery? The few travelers who did pass did nothing yet simply glare at the dieing boy, not showing a concern or pitied gesture. Usually no one did care, no one stopped to look, yet Jet was indeed different and very fortunate this day. He was lucky enough to have someone that cared for him, someone he would never expect to.

Virginia had ran up a sand dune examing over the land. She and the others had been looking for the loner all day since he left. Worried sick, she didn't know what to do nor did anyone else. They had followed after the footsteps the boy had left behind as their only clue, yet out of all of them Clive were most anxious to find him. "Here he is!" Virginia called back to her comrades from on top of the hill Quickly Clive climbed up the dune and made his way down to the fallen boy. He was the first to run to his side and examine over the boy's body in concern and regret. He placed a hand upon the boy's head, soon realizing how severe the situation was. Reaching to his side and picked the boy's head up so he could drink from his canteen of water. "He's dehydrated... We must get him somewhere out of the sun immediately."

Groaning softly, Jet tried to open his eyes. All he could see were the faded images above him. He knew exactly who they were. "Damn't..." He softly whispered. With no show in

a attempt of trying to get away, nor did he reject them. The only thing he could do was slowly drift back into his unconscious state. Clive could only stare down at the boy in his arms worriedly. He was the one who had gotten in a fight with him. It was over a stupid matter at that and because of that he nearly had lost him. His heart pounded, mind raged in hatred of himself to see what had happened because of the stupid quarrel, yet he was calm just to hold him in his arms. How peaceful he seemed, even though how wrong that feeling felt inside, he just soaked it up with every ounce of emotion in his body.

Virginia crouched by Clive's side, trying to think of a town that would be close by. "He doesn't seem to be doing to well. We have to get to town soon as possible." She answered with a slight sulk. "Yeah! Let's head there!" Gallows grinned at her trying to cheer her up. "They'll probably have somewhere to eat!" He cheered on at the thought of a meal. Virginia nodded with him, as they both quickly spoke of what they were to do once getting to the town. Clive just nodded, not saying a word however did begin to carry the boy across the harsh desert towards the west. His mind set more on the boy who were in such a horrible condition rather than food. The night drifted on slowly, not aging a bit as the moments seemed slow lasting forever.

_Jet._ A voice urged to call out the name. Nudging at his side, a soft muffled groan became evident in the darkness. _Jet, wake up. _The voice rang out to him. "Jesus..." The boy moaned rolling over to his side. The complete darkness of night had swallowed the room, only dim lights from the stars that were set across the sky served as their light.

Gazing about, blue eyes pierced through the darkness, slowly spotting the one who awakened him. "Damn't Clive!" He grumbled rolling back into his bed. With a sigh, the older man reached over taking Jet's galla bag which ordered an immediate reaction of the silver haired male. Grasping his wrist, he tried to get the money back into his possession yet Clive simply threw it upon the floor letting the coins scatter about. "Now, if you want that you have to be awake." He told the boy clearly.

Partially sitting up, Jet's stifled black shirt moved with his body looking to the other with a cold glare. There was no reason for any of this, no reason at all. Climbing out of the stiffly woven cot, he made he briskly walked across the floor. Each coin had to spill down the stairs. Damn it all! Clive's intentions were not for the boy however to pick up the coins. Grasping his arm, he pulled him into an embrace. "Calm yourself.... That isn't everything you know..." Quietly the man whispered into his ear.

Jet spun around shooting a glare at him, yet that slowly softened just gazing into the eyes of the other. Shaking his head, he just pushed that aside to look away. "Who asked you?! Why don't you go do research on some kind of freak!" He hollered in retaliation. Raising a gloved index finger, Clive rested it upon Jet's soft silky lips to hush them. "Shhh.... It's okay." He whispered.

Thumbing over Jet's lips, his own lips curved in enjoyment. Slightly putting pressure open the lips, he forced the young boy to open his mouth. Soon as his chance had became open, Clive took his chance. The warm luscious mouth of Jet. It tasted so good, almost heavenly to a point. How he long to do something like this with the sulking young boy. A way to see him smile, to cheer him up, to make him his. Married, he knew it was wrong, and even more for obvious reasons yet that didn't stop as his tongue began to search his mouth.

Jet's eyes widened with fear, confusion, and somewhat in joy as he slowly let himself become engulfed by the emotion displayed by the other. His heart pounded heavily. Finally, his body reacted by pushing Clive away. Panting a bit for breath, he whipped at his lips then spat upon the ground. Clive looked to him having only stepped back only about three feet before adjusting his glasses. "What the hell do you think your doing?" Growled the angst boy. "Fucking ass..." Not waiting for an answer, he quickly grabbed his things dashing down the stairs and outside. Clive just watched with him run off, quickly trailing after him. "Jet!" He called to him.

Working on getting dressed, Jet paid no attention to Clive, yet Clive didn't want to see the other run from him again. Wrapping his arms around the boy, a small soft sigh emitted from his throat. "Listen... I need to speak to you... It's about before." Stumbling, Jet felt paralyzed, unable to move in the others hold. He couldn't admit he liked how the other's touch made him think or feel. He hated it in a way, and in another way he loved it wanting more. "I don't want to talk to you." Snorted the boy while trying to get his boot on.

At a loss, Clive just let go of him, hesitating to do anything more then walk away from him a bit. Rejection was something he didn't expect. Taking off his glasses for a moment, he worked on cleaning them before placing them back carefully. "Where do you plan on going? I mean, can you really fight alone? With that sort of attitude in life, what memories do you hope to make?" That's what caught Jet's attention. His soft saddened eyes, the empty hurt expression. Clive never saw the boy like this, not since he spoke of how he had nothing. "I'm sorry...."

Jet shrugged to him, finishing on getting dressing himself. The crisp feeling of night was in the air, the freezing temperatures. Compared to the day, this was a haven to escape into, to escape away from. Thinking over it however, Jet didn't want to run, he didn't want to leave anyone behind. He was running away from them for all the wrong reasons. Looking back to Clive, he was confused on what to do with his life anymore. Life was meaningless to him, only money counted as it helped him survive into better conditions. In this journey, barely any money came his way, and when it did, it were split up between four so it were a small fraction as it was. Everything is shades of grey, and now it was finally becoming clear to him. He had to change himself. Sighing softly, he nodded to Clive slowly heading back towards the inn. "I'll stay... Just for tonight though." He murmured under his breath. A small smile curved over Clive's lips, watching the boy head inside. "Alright.... Good night."


	2. Love

_Memories, they taunted me often. I never really got the chance to even look at them to know there had to be something I had forgotten... Who am I? What was I brought into this world for? Why did I wake up that day? Why could I have just never been born? Asking such, I just laughed never getting an answer. I don't want my memories. I'm scared to find them truthfully. I don't want friends. They just drag me along; however, even when I don't want these things, I need them, more than anything. I want them... I wish I could just understand why I feel like this. Why these things confuse me._

Waking up to the sounds of his own thoughts, Jet rolled to his side in his cot. His thoughts were out of this world, and not wishing to disturbed. It wasn't unusual to find him like this. Often he was thinking of these truths, no matter how much he hated to admit each moment of it. The reasons for the cold glares, the silence, and his emptiness all remained in the darkness, he was afraid to let anyone enter that darkness to save him from the eternal hell he had been carrying on with.

Before Jet knew it, he fell out of the cot onto the floor. A disturbing way to wake up indeed was to Virginia. "Don't think you can get away with sleeping away the whole day! You got to do that yesterday." Her voice rose as if she had the best thing happen, as usual that was. That infernal annoying voice was all he could think of with irritation.

Clutching onto the many scarves he usually use to hide his body, quickly he stumbled to get dressed as the bloody woman went back to where the others were patiently waiting around a small table. Gallows had to be the first to say something, by just looking upon them there had been silence. "How did you convince that punk to even think about staying?"

Clive looked to the other's direction, lightly shrugging his shoulders. "I apologized, simple as that." Astonished, Gallows sat back in his seat nodding to him. "Damn, must have been one good apology. If only that would work on women now.... Then I would never loose a gal!"

Taking a seat near Gallows, Virginia laughed and shook her head. "You wish it was that easy! Hm... Say, Clive? Where do you think we should head to next?" That was definitely a difficult question. How? There were no leads, no signs, nothing. As said before, it was becoming harder to even find a trace of their true enemy.

Raising a gloved hand, Clive coughed covering up his lips. His eyes set upon the now dressed boy who was standing at the bottom of the stairs. The morning light made his skin seem so silky and soft compared to last night. Silver locks of hair glistened from the day, soft pale skin. He almost caught himself lost in a stare, or even a drool. Once again he coughed trying to look away from the boy. "Any suggestions, Jet?" Simply, he was just stunned on how he could have passed eyeing Jet before.

Ignoring Clive, he made his way over to a table away from the group. It was their fault in the first place he was awake. Crossing his arms gently, he stared blankly to the window gazing at the world outside. It was a small village they had gone to. There was nothing much really. Sure, there was a shop, an inn, and a few houses for those who lived there, yet there was nothing more. Is this what is left of the world?

Clive sighed lightly, pushing his bangs to the side. "I guess he's still a little mad at me for before? Jet, I said I'm sorry." Ready to rise from his seat to walk to the boy, Virginia had quickly interrupted by shaking Jet wildly in the chair. "Hey! I said no sleeping for the whole day!" She laughed a bit stopping from the action. Giving her a cold glare, he stood up crossing his arms. "What?" He muttered.

Sighing a bit, the girl shook her head to Jet in disbelief. "Do you ever pay attention?" She asked. Sitting at the table Jet had been sitting at, she smiled to him as if she were to start a conversation. "You know, you really need to loosen up. Why not talk to us? If something's bothering you..." Unable to finish the sentence, Clive hushed the woman by placing a hand over her lips.

"Let him be... If he doesn't wish to speak, then let us not force him. It takes time to truly trust someone with your feelings. Even when you do begin to trust, trust is always easy to be broken."

Scuffing a shoe, Jet turned away from them to face the door that led its way outside. "I only said I was staying till morning, there were no promises." Shortly with those words, he walked out casually trying not to show the struggling feelings that coursed through his body. Virginia sighed a bit shaking her head not understanding what was up with him. She was going to react, however it was her this time to have her reactions cut off.

Clive ran after the boy once again, stopping him on the edge of town. Silence reached over both of them, and with that Clive could sense something wrong. Hesitantly somewhat, he grasped Jet's hand turning him around. Cold, his whole body felt freezing. "J-jet?" He asked a bit shaken by the frozen body mass standing and breathing before him. No response came from the boy other than the glance he made to Clive.

"Clive... don't worry. I'm fine."

"N-no your not, you need your rest!"

Giving somewhat of a smug smile, Jet leaned towards Clive letting his lips brush across his. "Don't worry..." He repeated to him. Clive only could whimper feeling abandoned and worried. More than anything he wanted the boy to stay. Grasping his wrist, he held them tightly pulling Jet into an embrace. "Come on, your not feeling well for one. You shouldn't be up running around. If its money you're worried about, I'll pay you anything, just please stay with us." He pleaded to him.

Sulking a bit, Jet wanted to pull away. To run, to just get away, a part of him refused to let him do that to Clive. A part of him wanted to be held in his arms, just to lay down and fall asleep and forget of all his worries. It hurt, it was confusing, and he wanted it. "Leave me alone." He muttered in a cruel angsty way only to be silenced of having a tongue shoved into his mouth.

At first, he tried to pull away, but then he let his own tongue play with Clive's. Warmth began to build between the two bodies, Jet's especially. He even wrapped his arms around Clive's neck to try to lean more into the moment finding himself more and more into it. A soft groan passed through the kiss, quickly letting himself pull away with that not wanting anymore.

Sulking, Clive pulled away letting his tongue recede back into his mouth pulling a small trail of their mixed mucus along with it. "You know... your so beautiful." He whispered softly to him caressing his cheek. "No matter what, you'll always be to me, and look at that, your already warmer as it is."

Taking a breath, Jet turned away from him completely flushed covering his lips now. More and more want had climbed through him never like before. How could that be? He didn't want to believe that he 'liked' his 'friend' Clive. He couldn't believe it. Clive was a married man, even with a daughter. That thought alone made his chest feel heavier with an aching pain. 'It hurts....' He thought. 'Why does it hurt?'

Turning back to Clive, a deeper blush set across his cheeks when seeing from the window that both Gallows and Virginia were spying and witnessed the little event. Fear was becoming more and more in control of his actions. Backing away, almost stumbling, he could feel his body tremble with all the mixtures of feelings and needs. "Just stop it!" He cried holding his head. "Leave me alone!" Stepping foreword concerned, Clive tried to hold the boy only to be forced to back away. "Jet... please..." He pleaded with him.

Once again, Jet was on the run. His feet took control of his body having darted out back into the waste land to escape his emotions. He didn't want to stop running, he couldn't. Tears fled from his eyes and down his cheeks. "Jet!" He heard his name called in the distance multiple times, each time seeming further and further away.

Soon, he couldn't run anymore, and town was to far out of site by than. Collapsing into the sand, he pounded the ground with a fist just sobbing with to much to carry on an already burned heart. "I hate you!" He cried. "I hate you!" Repeating it each time, he pounded his fist harder and harder into the ground.

_I don't understand it. I guess I never will if I keep running away like that, but... Why does it hurt? Why do I feel pain when I try to look at facts rather than trust myself? I-I can't trust myself... That's how one is lead to death, to get hurt... I can't stop running now..._

Freezing in place, something strange took over the sensations sent through his body. The sand below him was giving way letting something rise. Shaken from before already, he could barely even stumble backwards watching a desert worm crawl out. It had to be at least over forty feet in length.

A fight, there was no other choice. Reaching back to his side for his weapon, slowly his eyes widen. It wasn't there; he left it behind in the rush. How could he have been so stupid?! Weaponless and powerless, he sighed lightly closing his eyes. Fate took it's coarse, that's what he believed. The way things turned out only proved what his life should become.

Spreading his arms open, he waited for the pain to shoot through his body. He waited for the death that was coming to him. He didn't receive anything of that matter. A sound of a loud crackle filled the air seeming to echo. "Didn't think I was going to let you go off on your own?" A voice said.

Resting his arms at his sides, a small smile came over his lips. _Why?_ Turning around, his eyes just spotted what he was truly waiting for._ Why did he follow me?_ His weapon were tossed to him. _He came for me... _Catching it, the boy grinned back at the man. _Clive... I don't understand..._ "Thanks..." Turning back around to face the beast, he prepared himself along side Clive. _You'll never abandon me, will you? No matter how far I run..._

Loading his weapon, Jet raised it prepared for the fight, side by side with Clive. Even though they were fighting alone, even though they left their comrades behind, something more was gained out of this. Something a lot more precious to Jet and something he never wanted to loose. That something was.

(Sorry for the shortness. I didn't think anyone was paying attention to this fan-fic, however I got a review! So I decided to write another chapter! I'll probably get some more up later! I hope you enjoy. ï )


	3. Fatal wounds

_Love, something I never believed in before. It was some kind of illness that would weaken one, pull them out of control. Why? I never really wished to understand it, nor did I try... With confusion, I soon learned that I had a new feeling. Was it love? I wasn't sure at the time, but I think I was falling deeper than love could ever hold. I think I was falling for Clive. Warm arms holding me tightly, it just made me melt. Soft kisses, it just made me want to hold on even more._

The night had set in with the stars glimmering over high above. Dozens, even thousands of stars were set beyond one's reach. How far could one reach before touching the nearest star was past so many human's imaginations; however Jet had caught himself believing he found his star, and that he would never let go of it.

It was after a long battle, the two had found themselves exhausted by fighting off such a large foe. Turning in early as the horizons were beginning to change into different hues of pink and orange, the two had set up camp. The two had layed down to rest with one another.

Clive was already humbly asleep holding the boy close to his body. His arms carelessly wrapped around his back and head to draw him closer to him. Jet starred down at him, letting his chin gently rest upon his chest. There were too many thoughts to sleep on, to many hidden feelings. "What makes you believe I'm so important?" Brushing a glove free hand across the slumbering man's cheek, a warm smile crossed his own cheeks. "I haven't done anything to deserve your affection, your love, your heart.... I wish I could understand Clive, really I do."

Sighing softly, he just looked to the scattered extra clothes they wore during the day. He himself was only dressed in his black t-shirt and jeans that was all he needed for tonight. Shuttering slightly from the cold, to his surprise, Clive pulled his long coat over their two bodies. "I wouldn't want you to catch a cold." He grinned brushing silver strands from the eyes he dreamt of. How cute Jet looked was all he thought of the puzzled boy's face for the moment. "You should get some rest you know... The way you have been, I would think you'd be tired."

Nodding to agree with Clive, Jet cuddled against his body for warmth letting the cloak cover him to the shoulders. The sounds of the fire near, the slight dimming light, warmth... Jet no longer kept those thoughts he held letting himself begin to drift off into what seemed an endless sleep.

Clive watched him while running his hand through the silver strands. His thoughts were the same as Jets'. Just dreams that were deeply focused on the other. How could something so wrong feel right? So many times those words had been repeated through the older man's mind. Jet, he was something he needed, something he wanted. For so long the boy was out of his reach. Tightening his grip around the boy's body, he smiled at him, he himself drifting off into that familiar feeling of sleep.

Dreams were often a reflection of what one really wanted. What one feared, hated, loved, lusted... A dream was a reflection, nothing more than the essence of your soul being shown to yourself. Sure, there were dreams that made no sense, and there were dreams that one wished to curl back up to and remember. All ended the same however.

In the end, you woke up and ended up forgetting it. Some struggled to think of their dreams after forgetting. I mean, do you even try to stop in the day after such a good dream?

An endless void of darkness, pain caressing every which corner of his body, Jet tried to escape, tried to scream. Nothing. His body felt so heavy, he couldn't run anywhere. Memories, visions... Breaking down, he only fell to his knees beginning to sob. "Stop it!" He cried as a vision of blood.

"Stop it!"

Those words were repeated over and over again. Heat began to spill around him; it was a great fire that burned. Stumbling back, he only shuttered beginning to go into a sort of a crawling backward position. Never had the boy trembled so. Suddenly, there was a light. So far above at first, he felt a calming warmth mix over his body. What was this? Reaching a hand from the darkness, he embraced the light feeling something grip upon him.

Blue eyes blankly stared at what was before him. Having been in a sat up position, Clive held him up worriedly. It didn't take much to tell when the man was worried. His expression always spilt upon his face giving away each moment he was saddened, scared, and happy, even more than there were to count. Small pants came from Jet's lips. Snapping out of a nightmare was one thing, but to find what the light was that relieved you of a nightmare was another.

Pulling his angel into an embrace, Clive ran a hand down his back trying to show that it was okay. "Sh..." He tried to hush him calmly. "It's alright..." Having repeated that several times to the boy, Jet let it sink in like old news. "Clive... You were watching me sleep?" Softly his voice asked. No answer coming from either one of them, Jet only wrapped his arms around the other...

Traveling was one of the most difficult things to do sometimes, especially across the wastelands. You could never tell how strong an enemy would be going from area to area. Sometimes it was just a moment of crossing some grass you would find a new fight to over come. Traveling as a group always made it easier.

Still unsure if they should retreat to the town he fleeded from, Jet blankly looked in the direction of once where he had ran from. Fully dressed, his eyes gazed back to Clive for reassurance only to be pushed ahead. "I don't want to go back..." He mumbled under his breath, however Clive still persisted they did.

"Come on love. I know you're scared to see them right now, especially after what they had seen but I'm sure they will understand." Seeing no change in the other's attitude, Clive wrinkled his nose before picking up the boy and placing him onto his shoulders. Squirming slightly from surprise and slight annoyment from his moment to sulk being ruined, he wrapped his arms around Clive's neck getting a free piggy back. It was a first for him to do, but soon he realized how much he enjoyed it.

"I'm not scared!" Jet claimed trying to protect what dignity he had left. Clive smirked, only to have his cheeks pulled really hard. "I said I'm not!" Jet said again while pulling Clive's lips in somewhat of a playful way. Chuckling, Clive shook his head deciding it wasn't best to let himself press upon the boy like such. "Okay okay!" He laughed.

Placing his angel upon the ground, Clive examined the town over with a curios look upon his face. "Where has everyone gone?" He questioned before looking to his small angel at his side. "Get ready for a fight... Something doesn't seem right."

Nodding, Jet drew his weapon before making his own observations. There was no other soul in sight other than the two who stood at the entrance of the town. How similar the situation was to an old western draw out. With the wind carrying sand across the dry ground, Jet gave a slight concerned look to Clive. "Did you hear that?" He asked. Giving him a blank look, Jet figured he was alone on this.

He could hear sounds echoing. What was it? Screams, cries for help, he could hear it all distantly and all to close. Shivering from the thought of what was occurring, he looked to Clive then to where he hoped the sound was coming from. It seemed that there had been attack. Stepping forward slightly, he took a small gaze around once again around the town for any clues of where those who were in danger were at. Closing an eye, he thought to himself before nodding quickly jumping up onto a wooden porch that was two stories high.

Astonished, Clive watched before having to climb up himself, after all, he wasn't as fit and young as Jet was after all. "What is it?" He asked once having gripped the railing pulling himself up only to cause more distress to see Jet running towards a mine shaft. "Urgh..." He mumbled before quickly going after him. "Jet, be careful!" He warned trying to follow after him and not loose him in the darkness.

Coming to a stop, Jet had found what he was looking for. A rather large dragon had everyone surrounded, and at it's side was Janus. That creep. How could someone with a human soul murder countless people without a care? Not even Jet was that cold at heart. Scowling, he knew that this fight was going to be by himself. Clive was to far behind, and Gallows and Virginia had been taken down during the fight against him. "I will not let you harm anyone..." He muttered drawing the large weapon. Whether death was going to sweep him away, or a victory, in the end, it would be the same as if dieing.

The last sight Jet remembered was Janus charging at him. The last sound he heard was breath escaping watching his own blood fly into the air. The thud against the cold ground, his heart slowing with each beat. Everything began to fade it's way into a bright light. "Clive... I'm sorry..."

(To be continued! I know, I'm kill you guys with shorts like this! Don't worry though. When I'm bored enough I'll write ten pages to torture you all. I might even post another for today. - Hope you enjoy!)


	4. Don't let go

Shutters made their way through Clive's body. Something was wrong, he could sense it. No longer could he see his love run before him. That boy had vanished into the darkness and now Clive was fit with a puzzle. There were so many tunnels, he was unsure of which way to turn or look. "Jet!" He cried out hoping the boy could here his words. "Jet, please! Where are you?!" He cried out once again each time receiving no response other than the cold draft of the cave.

Desperately he began to search taking a right tunnel. He quickly paced himself through it not daring to stop even for a moment. "Jet!" He kept saying while looking for him. With his luck, he soon found a large creature sleeping at the end of the cave he had ran to. Slightly backing up, he didn't want to disturb it. He couldn't risk himself of injury now.

Turning back to the way he came, quickly he choose another path. It seemed endless and hours were passing. Clive was running out of time. So many tunnels he had to travel down. Crouching over, he panted back into the original cavern with all the winding puzzles. Sweat ran down his body, exhausted from running so much. "Jet..." He gasped. He was loosing hope of finding his lover, loosing hope, loosing faith, and fear of the worst.

"I doubt your cries could reach him." A voice came from one of the tunnels.

Looking up, desperate to see who it was, he scowled a bit at those words. That voice, he knew it somehow, he feared it, and he hated it. Clenching a fist, he rose to a stand pointing his weapon. "What have you done with him?!" He muttered under his breath ready to blast the voice barrier into shreds.

Hesitant, but with a smirk, Janus walked from the shadows carrying Jet in his arms. Clive just shuttered with anger seeing Janus hold the boy... How pale he was, it almost looked like he couldn't hang on any longer. The face twisting with pain trying to strive to awaken. With a glare, Clive lowered his weapon. "Let him go." He ordered having no choice in fear of hurting Jet more. Janus shook his head and chuckled a bit.

"Why leave such a worthy thing here with worthless mortals?"

_Mortals? What is he speaking of? _"Maybe you didn't hear me. I told you to let him go." Taking a step forward, he seemed to try to threaten Janus with his weapon.

A grin played over the man's face watching the other struggle with his choices. It would be so easy to break his spirit by slaying the boy, yet that wouldn't be fun. He let his fingers run through his hair a bit dully. "In fact, I think I might keep this for myself."

When Clive tried to step forward once again to defend Jet, the dragon had stepped in his way to hold him back. He couldn't do this now, if he had to fight, he would loose Jet to a monster. "No..." He whispered under his breath. His eyes darted to see if there was a way around the creature, but no escape proved near.

His footsteps became backward from the beast, his body trembling with rage and fear. "Get out of my way!" He shouted looking towards the ground. The beast pressed forward after him, ready to slay on the mark. Clive raised his weapon, only to see two people rush before him.

"You don't have time for this!" Virginia said standing beginning to attack the beast.

"Hurry up! Were clearing a way for you, you moron! So stop stuttering and get going!" Gallows hollered back to him doing the same as Virginia.

His friends, they understood what was happening.... They understood his feelings, what he had to do. With a nod trying to snap out of the shocked state, he quickly darted past the beast when given a chance. "Thanks..." Softly he whispered under his breath. He prayed inside that they would be okay, even though he believed in no god as a researcher, he just needed hope.

The two left behind stood ready for battle. They really didn't want to understand what was going between Clive and Jet, but they knew they couldn't let them tare apart. Not by Janus, not by anyone. Their only mission was to protect them for now.

Panting, Clive chased after Janus fast as he could. How far had he ran down the tunnel? His fears of that it was already too late. It was when he slipped on something; he was beginning to realize what happened to the boy he so treasured. Blood, he sat up in blood. The way it looked, there had been a fight, a struggle and one failed to win. His mind shaken on fear of who failed, but he already knew.

Pressing forward, he forced himself to stand. "Jet..." He whispered a bit shaken. 'I won't let you die!' Quickly he began to run again finding what he had been looking for. Lunging himself, he tackled Janus to the ground forcing him to drop the boy. "Keep your filthy hands off him!" He yelled in anger gripping him by the collar.

Janus looked to him for a moment as a small chuckle came from him. "Keep my filthy hands off of him? You're the one playing with him.... Not me... Or shall I tell him your little secret when he awakens?"

Scowling with hatred, Clive watched Janus vanish from his grip. That coward, he wouldn't face a raged man like Clive. Especially when messing with someone he cared deeply for. His eyes stumbled to the boy who remained lifeless upon the ground.

Hot tears were building in his eyes. "Jet.... Please." He whispered crawling over to him. "Wake up..." Shaking him softly, he got no movement other than him shaking the boy. Each breath became heavier from his own lips. "Come on Jet! Come on, wake up! Your stronger than this!" He begged and pleaded.

It took him a moment before he thought of having to check for a pulse. Nothing, he felt nothing. Shaking, with fear he couldn't think of anything to do. That's when it hit him. He had to save Jet's life, and the only way possible he thought. Quickly he reacted beginning to give breathes to him. "Come on!" He said while putting pressure on the chest. "You can make it..." Each time he tried and failed, he felt hope was fading faster and faster each moment. "Jet, don't do this! Not now!"

Clive was loosing hope. Jet felt so cold, but he couldn't let him go. "Jet please..." He begged burying his face against the boy's chest. "Please..." He began to drift asleep tired from the tears that he shed. Finally he heard coughing having to snap himself awake. "Jet?!" It seemed his hopes raised watching Jet cough up some blood. "Your alive! Oh god! You're alive!" He said giving him a soft kiss.

Groaning softly, the boy shifted looking to Clive. "Yeah..." Softly he muttered in a barely in an audible tone. Looking over the wounds, Clive sighed a bit. "We need to get you out of here, with those wounds..." Taking him in his arms, he began to back track finding both Gallows and Virginia. "Are you guys alright?" Was one of the first things he asked. Both nodded looking at each other before looking back to Clive. "Yes, were fine. What about Jet though? Will he be alright...?" Nodding, Clive smiled slightly to them. "Yes, for now. We need to get him help though.

Night finally set in, as once again they group had checked in the town they were staying at. It was free for a matter of fact. A gift from the villagers for the group of four saving them from a death. It was the least they could do. A meal was provided as the three had eaten. Jet was to exhausted from the experience to want to go down the stairs, so Clive carried a dish of rice up to him.

Standing in the door way, he watched his young angel gaze out the window. How could ever someone bring harm to him, he didn't understand. With a sigh, Jet looked down a bit, leaning against the side of the window. Bandages were wrapped around his torso tightly, most of them smothered in blood from before. His bare body only had a pair of shorts on as he just stood still, ashamed of how easily he was brought down. He used to believe he was strong, but more than ever he felt weak.

Hearing something, he turned around finding himself facing Clive who was holding a bowel of food. He couldn't find himself to turn away from him. His eyes just connected to his feeling himself embrace him. "Clive..."

A bit confused, Clive smiled at him gently putting the food down before returning the hug. "I'm glad your feeling better...."

"Mhm, thanks to you...." Jet softly whispered.

With a smile, their lips met with a brush before diving into one another. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you... I promise though, I will be there for you always from now on."

(To be continued! XP Thanks for all the great reviews everyone! I'm so glad people enjoy this. I don't' find this as the best fan fic for I could do a better job, but I always wanted a ClivexJet story never finding one! Anyhow, if anyone ever wants to contact me to clue me in with ideas, my aim is Kitsune Hat, see you all next time I post!)


	5. heart's are young

:: Author's Note::

Oh, you reviewers are to kind, really. - You guys have been pushing me to write, and without that I would of long have stopped at the first chapter. I just wish I could write better and longer chapters to keep you all amused for a mere longer than how short these stories are. Anyhow, on to the story! Oh, and I warn ye, this chapter is based on Jet's confused heart. It begins to dig at his very thoughts. I thought it would be a nice change. :: ))

_The world is such a vast place. Hidden stories, myths, and unexplored adventures just waiting to happen around each corner. Traveling the world was such a dream to me. Well, more of waking up from a nightmare. Despite how short my memories may be, the world has come around to become beautiful in my eyes. I just wish I could always continue along this journey with you... I wish I could always be at your side... and you at mine..._

_There is so much for me to learn, and time seems to run out quicker than I can breath. To anyone else, the wastelands would be hell. To me, it is my sanctuary, my heaven, my hell, it is my world which I am forever bound to. _

_It's where everything began, what memories I hold, and where I met him. Before, I never stopped for the world. I just let time slip through my fingers. So much confusion, hatred, and fear had built up inside this empty vessel, just making me seem cold to the world. Untouchable to a point, I never wanted to end up like that. Even a part of myself was lost amongst the sea of damned. _

_Each time though, I began to find myself in a new place, a new situation, and finally... with friends. At first, it was difficult to call them even that... It was difficult to even talk to them at times. I was so use to being off alone; I wished I still was back then. Sometimes when I am alone now, it just doesn't feel right. _

_Sure, some people may think I'm strange, I'm different of course. I'm not like anyone else, and I will never be like anyone else. Created, I didn't belong to this world. I don't belong to any world. My existence is false, but I don't worry... I trust in my heart, I trust in myself, I trust in him... that is all I need from life. Never had I felt so complete._

'_My name is Jet....'_

_I have no real past, just the one I'm creating. I never had a chance at a real life, but now, I thank you Clive. You awoken me, into a world I wish to breath, a world where I wish to soar above in the sky. As long as I'm in your arms, I feel as if I can do anything, I feel safe, I feel as if I could drift away. Clive.... Truthfully, I think I'm falling in love with you. Please, say you'll never let me fall. Pathetic as it may sound, I don't want to fall Clive... I don't. Please, I love you._

_The way your touch makes me shiver, your eyes make me weak. How my knees seem to give in, every time you speak. I beg of you, to never let me go. Hold me tight Clive, for you are everything to me, now that I'm free. I can finally see... That one question is left... Clive, you can't answer this to me. It's my decision, and mine alone. If I have to speak it, I would in a heat beat without a hesitation or a glace. The question I dare ask is a simple few words. Clive, Am I in love? Clive...Please hold me my love... _

Tangled in cloth, softly violet eyes stared up to the wooden ceiling above. Long had night flown through the air swaying those who remained in the very grasp of sleep at ease. Sometimes, it was almost as a sort of spell. People would dawn upon the day, and fall upon the night. No, it was natural for most.

Never was there anyone awake upon the night wastelands. Often, they were barren at the even mention of dusk. Why? No one really knew. Perhaps it's because it was best to travel at day? No, that couldn't be it. To many drifters began to roam during the light hours. Why was darkness so abandoned? Staring at the ceiling, Jet just tried to understand the things that were never really asked in the first place.

It would have been nice to of gotten a bit more sleep. Just maybe it would have been, but no longer could he keep still. Darkness drifted over like a plague. Most things, Jet already missed out on in life. Mainly, enjoying life. Removing the covers from his body, softly he tangled himself free from Clive's arms. He couldn't help but look back down at the sweet man who he treasured so. How? Why? So many questions he held in that cold heart, but finally, it was warming.

The wooden floor below creaked in protest as the boy made his way to outside. Just as he thought, not a single soul in life. One could figure that of any night. Wrestling to slide the black cloth onto his torso, it provided the small warmth he would need for now.

"At least, the stars are out."

Alone he sat on the edge of town, gazing at the lights above. The wind seeping it's way around. Shivering lightly, to his surprise there were a coat draped around his shoulders. That old familiar feeling and smell. He soon felt an embrace from behind him, only causing him to laugh and look back to Clive.

"Did I wake you?" Softly he asked at first.

Clive only grinned, tightening their embrace for a moment. So, maybe clothing wasn't warm compared to Clive. He couldn't cling to him forever though, no matter how much he wished he could. The man took a seat at his angel's side letting his hand ruffle the silver strands.

"Clive?" Softly Jet asked.

"Jet... Is something wrong? You know, you don't have to sit outside if your uncomfortable with sharing a room."

Shaking his head, Jet found no words for it. He only could find himself leaning against Clive. The world stopped them, or at least Jet. Everything he could ever want was there. Someone to love him, to care for him. Scared, Jet was thinking of some thoughts, but he couldn't bear to even think of those at a moment like now.

"Clive, what do you plan on doing after our journey? I mean, after we bring life back to this world... What will we do? Where are you going to go?"

_Clive, I wish you could stay with me. I wish I could make you, but I couldn't tear your happiness away. I can't bear to see you down. I just hope you stay with me, wherever you go, that's where I want to be. Anywhere in your arms..._

Clive softly sighed, trying to think of the words to put together for him. How to explain it at least. He himself didn't know. Confused on whether to choose his wife or Jet, softly he shook his head placing a kiss on the other's pale forehead.

"Jet, I really don't know yet. I promise you though, someday I'll provide an answer. Until then, don't worry about it. For all we know, this journey could last forever."

Caressing the Jet's cheek, he lifted his chin so that their eyes could meet. Each of them gazing softly to each other, almost seeing to each others soul breathing out a familiar emotion each held deep in their hearts... The moment, the night, everything seemed to slowly set in. Stars above glittering as each of their lips stumbled upon another. Maybe it was the fact that stars were streaming by, but never had Jet felt so far into his heart than anything.

_I-I found my answer Clive... You don't have to say anything to me, you don't have to explain anything to me. I understand what I feel, what I want, what I need Clive... I understand my heart belongs to you. I understand that your torn between two loves. I understand your struggling, I understand Clive... I love you. I just wish you were forever mine. _

:: Author's note::

Ah, short chapters torturing you yet? I figured that. Just that I get lazy and brain dead at times. I'm sure I'll post one either tomorrow or in the next few days. ï 


	6. Heaven not there

_It it's one thing I learned from this experience, love is something priceless but can hurt. Painfully more than anything... I fear what the outcome of my new found love can bring, and what may happen to me if I loose it... But, I can't think this way. Not now, not ever. My love is filling me into a new light, a new feeling into this world. I want to understand it. I want to hold it, most of all; I want him to understand it. I wish I knew his choice, I wish I could tell him what to choose. I shall find out though... It's all in the future._

Clumsily, the older man's hand stumbled across his. At first it seemed to be an accident. That was before he took the boy onto his lap. The older man's hands explored over the younger male's body. Lips crossed one another depleting a need to think.

_Is he... trying to tell me?_

Being guided inside, Jet just seemed to smile along the way. Clive could be so confusing at times, however it was the greatest thing to happen to him. He didn't want to think of loosing him. Not now. His body was pushed against the hallways' wall; lips brushing across one another in a needing passion only parting for breathes and continued to play.

Stripping off each other's clothes, they both stammered their way into the bedroom. Between their tugging of one another's clothes and soft laughs and groans mixed, Jet found himself pinned against the bed. Staring up at Clive, he grinned at him letting their lips begin to return their passion with one another, but Clive's mouth was moving on to the pale chest of the boy he had. Gently he nipped at his nipples causing Jet the gasp, each time moving lower for the boy feeling his erection build up.

"Clive!" Jet gasped squirming under the weight of his lover. His legs found their way creeping around Clive's waist, whimpering under his command.

"Don't worry Catherine.... I'll take care of you..." He said pushing away his legs from his waist. Freezing, he just realized the error in what he said. He just called Jet... Catherine. Gazing up to Jet, smiled a bit sheepishly to him. "I mean... Jet." There was no way to realize himself of the mistake of his words, and he could tell by Jet's expression that there wasn't a way either. "J-jet... I didn't mean to...."

That night, Clive said nothing more. He left the room leaving Jet alone after having his way. Inside, Jet no longer knew how he had felt. No longer did he want to feel love. It felt more like a thorn tearing into his side than love. His body hurt, as well for his mind. Tears beginning to slip down his cheeks. Shaking, the boy rolled to his side trembling between his own sobs finding no comfort other than Clive's jacket.

No matter how many times Jet tried, he received only a slight smile before getting the distant look once again to stare at the ceiling. Clive left him there in the cold without anything other than the jacket to leave back memories. Well, it was nice to dream, wasn't it? The world could be harsh at times. Other times, even the smallest joys would remind one of pain. _Why not relieve this from me now?_

When morning came into the open, there was nothing to think of. Nothing to see, or to believe anymore. Silence was like a heavy stricken object bringing truth. Trudging down the stairs, Jet rain his finger tips along the railing, trying to figure out the night before. Was it that hard to make a choice? He was actually afraid, afraid to find out what Clive's heart really needed. Finding only one answer, that picture didn't revolve around him. It revolved around another. It didn't matter if he was to be alone. He didn't care, he just wanted to be alone once again, no matter what one could say or do.

One by one, everyone made their way down stairs to find Jet sitting alone at the bar side. Clive was the last to find himself down stairs, staring confused at the sulking boy who was across the room. The expression he held, was he in pain? Casually he tried to walk over, however was pulled away by Virginia.

"So, since when did you guys have feelings for each other?" She giggled partially at what she said. To her surprise, those words made Jet wretch: grasping the cup that he had been savoring the drink that was within, the sounds of cracking filled the air. Glass spread across the floor and table, blood dripping down his hand. Once again, Clive stepped towards him getting no response from the angel before him.

"Jet?" He softly whispered a bit confused by the reactions he was receiving from him. Nothing came but silence.

"Do you hear me? Jet?!" He called once again. Slowly he remembered the night before. How? How could he do that to Jet in the first place? Sighing softly, he tried to at least sit at Jet's side to talk to him; however there was still no response. "Listen Jet, I'm really sorry about last night. I messed up. I didn't mean to."

The chair was slid in under the counter top. Jet having his back turned to the group. When finally he felt he belonged somewhere, it was shattered just like the glass. His body covered as usual with the materials that always covered him; however his scarves were pushed up more to hide his expression.

Clive tried to step forward, to say anything to Jet. The end of a gun was placed under his chin in the process followed by a cold glare. "Jet. Listen I..." There wasn't time for talking. Jet had left leaving Clive stand there with the others. Just as he left him last night having gotten what he wanted despite the words he had said.

To turn back now was to accept this pain. It wasn't worth turning back for. Not for the world would he turn back. Tears ran down his face once again. How he trembled, becoming to weak to even think. To Clive, he wasn't even now a dot in the horizon. He was long gone. He couldn't catch him even if he tried.

Virginia blinked looking to Clive, confused on what just happened. "Clive?" She asked. Seeing that he wasn't going to answer, she looked back to Gallows with a small frown upon her lips. "Gallows, you try to find Jet, alright? I'll talk to Clive."

On his knees, Clive remained still. His glasses becoming fogged between his frustration and tears. "He didn't want that..." He whispered half under his breath. "Oh god, Jet... What have I done..."

_He didn't want this... How could I have done this to him? D-did he cry? Jet... Did... Did I rape you?_

::Author's note.::

Sorry for lack of updates and for the well, pitiful state of this chapter. –Hums and switches back and forth on balls of feet.- Anyhow, as the story states, this is a bit more troublesome chapter than the one before. I hope you enjoy!! Oh, and this chapter was inspired off the song heaven's not enough from Wolf's rain! -Poor Toboe.-


	7. farther apart

::Aurthor's note::

Ah, I'm annoying you all with these short little chapters still aren't I? I'm so sorry for the lack of updates. I've been busy with... erm... Well! I was sick puking up a lung the other day. Not literally but if I threw up anymore I would of! Anyhow, I'm back on track and writing. Experimenting with different ways to write too. Enjoy!::

::Jet::

_I never thought I would have to be alone again... but here I am, alone sitting in a town in the middle of no where. It's been a week since I left, and so far traveling, I heard nothing of them... Why should I worry though? There isn't a reason to return. I am a lone drifter, one who cares of nothing... No matter where I shall end up, that is where I'll be. The past cannot be changed, no matter how I wish if could. The past is how it is. I have no past, but at least I made myself something... even if that something is nothing. I would rather have any other fate but this...It's already to late though. I'm alone on the side of myself. I just wish... I could fade away._

Light, it was everything. No hidden darkness crept anywhere. Was it death? Or was it a new beginning? A song, it echoed deeply into the distance and through ones' mind. Truly, this was peace. Feeling as if he was floating, Jet stood in the midst of it all, gazing upon a tree.

"W-where am I?" He muttered half under his breath. Taking a few steps forward, he placed one of his bare hands upon the tree, feeling warmth pour into his dark soul, but the rest of the light grew dark and the tree withered and died. Stricken by fear, he stammered back, turning to run. There was no where to run or hide, but he fled into the darkness. Each step making him sink deeper and deeper into it till it became like a shadow devouring him.

"No! Stop it!" He cried struggling through the darkness, trying to get the grasp of cold to let him go. "Please!" Struggling more, he shoved his way out of it, running once again. Each time, the darkness grew deeper with new things forming. Spiders.... Demons, monsters. All appearing in the darkness.

Finally, he no longer could run. Sinking into the darkness there was nothing left but to give up. Relaxing within the cold, the float less feeling vanished. Warmth was becoming nothing but bitter cold, and sight was dimming. His body sank deep into the pitch black, the song still ailed in a holy tune of angels singing.

Feathers deploying from his body, piecing apart creating blood in what seemed to be water. Everything was drifting away upwards where he couldn't reach. Reaching up a hand, he tried to open his eyes in a last attempt to reach out for the heavens, if they existed or not. A small light strived above, even that was vanishing.

"C-Clive...." He whispered under his breathe. Finally, total cold set in. His body becoming numb, a part of the darkness.

Taking a deep breath, he ran a hand through the silver locks. Nightmares.... Something that has been plaguing him for the last week. How.... He hated it. He could feel himself shutter from it, but in a way smirk from the mere presence of fear. Laying back into the covers, his eyes passed over a window that let light flood into the room. Morning had come, and well. This wasn't a hotel or inn exactly.

It was exactly two days ago when a girl found him stranded in the middle of no where. He was exhausted and fainted from the hot weather. She was kind enough luckily to take him in. So far, he was almost done recovering, however never muttered a thank you to the girl. It was always silence staring back to the window. He wanted to thank her, it was just that a part of him was stuck into his dream. He let himself become devoured in that vortex like before with no one to pull him free. He didn't want to either....

Covering himself with the sheets to block out the world, lightly he whimpered to himself trying to think what to do with himself from now on.

_Nothing... Nothing is valued to me anymore. What am I to look to? I have no friends... no one cares for me, and I don't want anything to do with money... Urgh, I can't believe I'm even thinking of this!_

Hearing the door open, he sat up half way to see who had walked in. Once again it was the girl with a tray of food. Sweetly she smiled placing the tray on Jet's lap. She didn't wait for a thank you. She was growing to use to such cold behavior from the drifter.

Flopping down onto the bed, the sound of the plate shattering on the cold floor caught his attention. It was almost a routine by this point. The woman would place a plate of food for the young drifter, and the most he would do was snub the food. Seeing another part of the new routine be put into action, he watched the woman walk over and begin to clean up the mess he created. Softly sighing, this time, he would change the routine. It was better than sulking to himself for the rest of his days.

"Why?" He asked softly to her.

It was an obvious surprise to the woman to hear his voice for the first time.

"You haven't asked me anything... My name... my past... what had happened. You take care of me with no question. Why?"

The woman softly sighed, shaking her head walking over to the lonely drifter sitting to his side. "Because... You're a stray..."

'A stray?'

_I didn't think of it then, but those words were so true back then. I was a stray, betrayed, beaten, and confused I was running away from my problems not daring to go back, but as all strays end up, they always are loyal._

Days seemed to have flooded by without questions, and Jet took his leave with no answers. With no questions, how could he answer? The building pain in his chest increased while he traveled the waste land alone. The world to him was becoming a deeper shade of grey. The world was dead. With a grin plastered on his face, pain was his least worries. Pain, it was so simple to hide.

::Clive::

_The fact that Jet had left was a hard fact alone, but how I used him... I hurt him beyond anything, getting along was more difficult than anything. I was wasting my life away trying to keep distant from my fellow comrades wasting money and time on drinking heavily. At night, sometimes I shook awake wondering how I awoke that night... or to find a stranger in my bed. Each time, I became sicker and sicker with grief realizing how much I missed him..._

Laying in the comfort of a bed, Clive took off his fogged glasses rubbing the side of his head. Sudden sharp pains shot through his skull causing the man to jolt with a whine. With a bottle in his hand still, he whined some more giving a soft whimper. "Can't you see? I'm nothing without you... Please, forgive me." He mumbled half under his breathe letting his hot tears roll down his cheeks.

_I hate myself..._

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_::Authors Notes:_

Hehe, having a few friends pushing me to continue this fic is great. Keeps me occupied despite having other things to do. Ah, I'll get to them. Though getting a bad grade in the process.


	8. Crawl in the rain

:: Author's Note::

Rain

Pairings: JxJ/JxC

A/N: I wuv Halloween! Just wish I could have gotten a Halloween special up but since I didn't, I'm doing a special! Hopefully this is better than my normal writings. Oh, and thank you all for the reviews! Oh, and Black Waltz, get writing your JetxClive fan fic! They are a very addicting couple and you must finish your unfinished fan fic you good writer you! - Anyhow, I should get to writing/finishing this thing before it bugs me out of my mind!:::

('.')

( )

L

::Jet's PoV::

_A long time ago, I was told by a strong man that 'The only person you can depend on is yourself.' Those words could never be more wrong all at once. Fighting alone was one of the most difficult things to do in this world. To be alone, I was brought into this world alone and shall go out of it alone. The only thing wrong about that saying is that it doesn't mention that the only person you can trust is yourself, but you can depend on the world for everything else. Learn these rules and surely one will become victorious over others. Who knows, maybe once someone awakens to these rules, they could grow a better understanding of the world around them. Out of everything though, the only truth I will ever know is that hallow feeling inside. _

_Everyone has that feeling time to time. Those lonely drinkers staring into the empty glass, just wishing for a part of it to be filled to numb all your sorrows away; however life seems never to flow amongst that path. No... Instead it whips everything dry when it's done. So, here I am. Alone, and waiting for my final judgment this world shall give me. Am I bound to the heavens? Am I chained into the dark pits of hell? Or... shall I suffer a fate worse than hell? Shall I end up cast alone into the cold for the rest of my artificial life? Usually, I would never pray. I'm not even a religious person, but I pray tonight... Please guide me down one path to nullify this hallow shell. Weather it be destruction or purity, guide me to the end. The sky no longer holds my journey ahead...And I am alone. Guide me into the rain, for you bring me closer to god._

Rain, the most precious gift this desert planet could ever see. The forgiving winds rarely shunned their face upon the world, and at last a glimmer of hope had arrived. Rain poured down from the heavenly skies, dampening the land below. Many of the villages and towns celebrated. Children running amongst the streets seeing something for the first time, their parents seeing a miracle blessed towards their children. In all, it seemed over a night people grew closer together, and maybe further apart. The strings pull apart, as everything fades away. With cold carrying over, it wasn't long before it frozen into more of a wondrous land that many have never drawn their eyes to. The world glistening before them, for the first time, humans could see a beautiful ending day.

Days, weeks, maybe even months seemed to float by. The mighty group of four had dwindled down to three, and even then two, no and even until it was none. Clive had left weeks after the young android had vanished into the world. His own guilt stung into his heart, tearing each piece of him away. That boy meant so much, and in a moment he destroyed him. A moment of loosing self control, where in which everyday he wishes he could take back. 'My dear angel...' The others could have done nothing to stop him from leaving. The sad empty look in his eyes revealed a man searching, searching for what he believed and needed. Searching for what he lost and may never recover, the man was lost and continuing to follow his heart.

"Jet, I will find you... I just want to say....."

Clive, he was alone knowing he would never get him back. He had lost everything he had came to love in his journey, and now his life was coming to an end with no purpose to it other than to fade into the distance of an after life.

'Jet... I'm sorry.'

The silver haired angel himself was lost in his own existence. While Clive had the support of friends, the world wasn't very supportive in a way towards Jet. In fact, it was just as cruel as ever, like before he learned to take care of himself, and only himself. Having traveled the world over, soon he himself was growing with exhaustion, even a loss of hope inside. Out of everything, he only regretted one thing. "Clive..."

'If you could hear me now, you would know I love you. If you could see me now, I would show you how I cared. If you were here right now, would I be in your arms? Clive, if you were with me... I would not have to shed my last tear for you.'

Warmth was constantly escaping his already exhausted body; he was becoming too weak to carry on. Every breath was fading, every moment becoming colder. He couldn't hear, he didn't want to see, he couldn't feel the snow build around his flesh, but that didn't change anything. When the snow stopped, never did he emerge, nor did he stir. Lifeless, the young android laid cripple buried beneath the blankets of white. Sadly, it wasn't his end, his suffering would continue, but a part of him nullified to be awakening in a new view.

Days later, Jet was back on his feet traveling the world around. A part of him did die that night, but a part of him also grew that night. He learned he couldn't blame himself for the past; he could create a new future for himself though. If someone were to follow, they could join into his world of a brighter future, as long as they were side by side, the world would take them into the flow of time.

Hot sand blowing everywhere, the world had returned to its normal state. The normal activities presuming, the drifters reaching back to their dreams. Deep into the wastelands, the sounds of fight echoed loudly, two men fighting side by side. One with silver hair and was agile with a heavy attack along side of an older light blue haired fellow who used the powers of a sword to balance out the attacks. At first, one would think they were fighting one another, but indeed they had been fighting together and working on hoarding off a small army of demons. Their skills showing on how well their attacks intertwined depending on one another. Different maneuvers, tactics, and styles shown through over and over again until both could finally rest and laugh at their mistakes during the small battle. Jet and Janus, fighting side by side, once sworn enemies now lodged one by one fighting towards the same goal. Freedom, what neither possessed but wanted more than the world. Jet to be freed from his curse and Janus from his restrains. Both of them having found one another by accident one day, and so far it was the best thing for Jet to forget about Clive. Janus was like a pill, a current pain killer.

"I told you that would work." Janus smirked to Jet, gently nudging him trying to cheer up the moping boy near him. Grinning even more to hear a chuckle from Jet, Janus gripped an arm over his shoulder softly getting a tough playful ruffle to the boy's head.

_If you don't trust someone, it's impossible to get hurt in the first place by them. Their words, lies, emotions they hide inside mean nothing. To them, maybe someone else means something, but not always the same affection is returned. An emotionless love, maybe even lust? Whatever it was, it was nothing but a pain killer for the moment. _

_Take my pain, kill it for me. Turn it inside out, do with it as you please. Take it away, destroy it for me, kill my pain, kill it for me. For I'm so dirty, I can never be clean, for all I am is dirt. The filth won't wash away, it won't leave my skin, I will always be dirt. It only hurts to breath; it always hurts to cry, for I am so empty inside. I am my death, I am my tears, I am my becoming of an endless spiral down._

_::Clive's PoV::_

_Ever since he left, the world hasn't been the same. Every detail seems to be darker than it had been. My eyes always begin to feel heavy before I even awake. Maybe it's because I feel guilty, or maybe it's because I care. Sometimes, I wish I didn't hold such feelings. I wish to scoop him up in my arms, but I know I can't. Sometimes I wish I could hold him, and sing him to sleep. I search for him endlessly, to try to bring him back. It's not a lust I hold towards him, it's my feelings wanting to unfold. Until I speak those words to his face, I will travel the world in his footsteps following every trace. My forbidden love has been spread, to be known to the ears I wished to hide it. I broke their heart, but they understood my plea. My love for the boy had grown even over time, but has his hate grown as well? I just want to see him smile... to see him laugh, to see him one last time._

Gloved fingertips slid over the rim of a glass, guiding over it delicately trying to keep his eyes on the trail. Another empty glass remaining on a table, Clive stared down to it wishing it would be filled. It had been his fifth drink, but it didn't matter. Addiction to have more, he pushed it aside receiving another thick full glass of the bitter tasting liquid. His breath reeking of the alcohol. He rose once that night, to dance like any drunken man would do when being told to. As well as any drunken man, he awoke the next morning with a splitting headache and a hate towards the world.

'When the morning comes, I wish to be dead.'

:To be continued::

A/N: I plan on getting more into character next chapter hopefully because I seen that my characters aren't interacting very well. This chapter was more spiritual and thought out as the other one had been. –Nods.- I hope you enjoyed! I almost forgot about this fic.


	9. This filth is me

**::Author's Note::**

**Dirt**

**Pairings:** JxJ

**::Warning:: **

**Contains:** Abuse; _Rape;_

**Future:** Fluff

**::Jet's PoV::**

_With constant battles to discover one's self, it's always a surprise on why some wake up in the morning. Maybe it's the skies above that keep them moving, but to me it only brings me down. In this heartless world, it's hard to bring myself alone to wake up to the morning light. How that damned light brings a sharp pain to the back of my head after a long night, I do not know, but the beautiful sky above had me lost today. Sometimes the way the world turned I would believe it was showing me a new path however... That path always had the ending I couldn't see. Fear was something that many couldn't bring themselves to face. Even me, Jet Enduro am afraid of what I fear. My dreams are not those that have spiders to cry over... No... I don't have the legendary monsters chasing me down a hall way, I have my own monsters. The main monster I fear though, out of all the other ones are worse. Constantly, it will never leave me alone in the back of my mind. It will always be standing over me, every waking moment. I cry to get myself to sleep sometimes, yet it doesn't stop. Continuously, these dreams carry out each day. The monster I fear that travels amongst the same path I do... is... myself._

_Think..._

His body was betraying him in every way he thought it could. Every cry was of his bodies' enjoyment, but not his own. Each thrust from the other made him want to die, and he did inside but also _enjoyed it_. It was like someone else possessed him and controlled each reaction he held. His breathes becoming heavy, deepening his urges into the lustful night. Grasping a hold of his back, he knew that he couldn't hold out much longer than the other, for he was still new to this new... experience. His legs cringed, wrapping tightly around the other's back, just begging at this point to continue... A sharp cry reached his lips, pain and pleasure mixing together all at once when everything had just seemed to fade away into darkness.

_Get away..._

::Morning::

His lips spread open into a small smile welcoming the new arrival of the autumn morning. As cold seeped through the air in the room, young Jet fluttered his eyes fluttered open to the world trying to place himself in the middle of everything. With the night hitting him heavily like a ton of bricks, he managed to muster a groan from the cracked voice of a long painful hang over. Chills traveled over his spine, awakening to the smell of fresh coffee brewing not even in another room a far from him. When rolling over, an empty feeling struck through his heart, piercing every side of it to awaken next to _him_.

_Run fast as you can..._

He began to stumble about the room to find the clothing that had been tossed about the night before. 'Had it really gotten that out of hand?' The least of things he wanted was to awaken next to his enemy, and even bare at that. Reaching for his shirt from the lamp, hesitantly he pulled it over his smooth skin looking back to the slumbering Janus. Was it right to just leave like this? With a part of him wanting to run, and another part of him wanting to stay, sluggishly he dressed himself but was only able to get his under clothes on when the slumbering male had awoken to look to him. "Your in a hurry." His voice chuckled childishly to him in a taunting manor.

_Run away..._

Cringing at what he had done, Jet looked over his shoulder harshly. He hated Janus, always he had. Last night was a night however of a hated lust, and even more vengeance, however Jet didn't do the punishing. "What are you looking at?" His voice muffled by the wrappings of the scarves around his neck hiding the marks and bites left behind. "Something that is beautiful and mine..." Proudly he held up a pair of handcuffs with his index finger, gently swinging them back and forth. Finally gripping it, a grin crept over his lips watching Jet's every reaction. "Up for another round, love?"

_Escape..._

Scowling under his breath, Jet turned his back to the man in bed finishing with his dressing signaling that he was soon to leave. Tying off the ends of the scarf, Jet casually strided towards the doorway pulled back hard against the wall. Janus had the opposite in mind though as Jet. He drove him towards the bed, straddling the boy's waist while working on chains to make him hold still, but Jet was a fighter... at first. He watched Jet squirm as he began to strip him leaving marks on the pale silky flesh that most of them could heal, but one wouldn't. He watched him struggled when knocking the boy's head against the wall, and even grow still and silent when forced to far. "One last dance my Jet?" He asked with a grin, caressing roughly his bruised side. "Why I'd love to." Janus grinned answering himself watching tears begin to run.

_While you can..._

_Have you ever had someone try to tell you how you feel? Like the can explain to you, you, like a laid out book that everyone can read for their enjoyment. If I was a book, I'd be torn into pieces so no one could read a page. I would be a lost langue so no one would understand me, or even hear my words anymore. My stories would make those cry, and others want to draw back. If I was a book, I would be hated and banned, and most of all treasured by the one who holds it. If I am a book, your probably reading me right now, for you are me. I am a book laid out for all you to read, abused and laid torn, you can hear me cry. You can hear me shake, you can see me shiver. You can see me cry, and you can feel me die. Destroy this horror story already, it's not worth reading._

_Now that I'm nobody_

Left behind in the cold, the boy had been abused to where he couldn't feel a part of him no more... No longer could he move, his body coursed with to much pain. No longer did he want to breath, as each breath hurt him deeper more. Chains rattled as he cried out for help, but no one came that night, nor for days. Blood spread across the bed, trickling droplets even to the floor. Forever they would be stained with his 'dirty' blood. Setting his fate into his mind, Jet cried more each time Janus had arrived back to greet the alone boy, only to abuse him in his way again. It went on for weeks until finally he was left alone so he could die in peace perhaps. Jet didn't know, but....

'_Did... He forget me?'_

Opening his eyes for what he believed to be one last time, he could feel them draw wider open than he wanted. Something forced him to look up, even with all the energy he no longer owned he wanted to. Those familiar eyes looking down upon him, just having to seem to awaited him to awake. _He_ had been sitting at the edge, smiling down to Jet. But... why? Why was _he_ here? Jet couldn't understand until the chains were being lifted off from his body and wrist, freeing him from the restrains. He whimpered, but soon was engulfed in a warm pair of arms drawing him close to his chest. The boy's cries became hushed as the man who sat there stroked his hands through the grey strands of hair, gently rocking him in his arms. Lifting his head, Jet had to make sure this was real... That it wasn't just a dream.

_Where... did he come from?_

Leaning up, his eyes closed softly to return to that darkness in his mind. It didn't stop his action that he wanted to prove to himself. With their lips tying together, Jet finally felt as if he had found what he had been looking for on this lone journey... and Clive felt the same.

_I found what I was looking for..._

And lying in his arms, Jet soon fell back into a content state of sleep.

_It was you all along._

To be continued...


	10. Heaven is hardly Perfect

**::Author's note::**

**::Heaven is hardly perfect::**

**::Clive's P.o.V::**

_Waking up to a dream, it's kind of hard sometimes. Waking with tears running down your cheeks horrified from a nightmare can ruin your day. It just hurts inside to know that reality and fiction can cross your mind so easily. With a smile carved over your lips when awakening from heaven it can make the world seem to turn and grin back. Already the world was changing for a better side perhaps. The once bitter nights were growing warmer, and the slightest troubles had changed at heart. Was this world heaven, or was it not enough? Does this world exist, or is there no path for us follow down? If so, what path is there to follow along? The roads had long ago crumbled into ruins at the touch of those before. With golden gates closed, I can take your hand and lead you into my heaven where there is no pain. Jet... I welcome you to my heaven._

**::Four weeks Earlier::**

**::Before the final encounter::**

Time was slowing passing, the world dreaming by. Those who slumbered stared to the stars. Was there any hope up in the lights above? The empty feeling radiating back towards him while searching inside for answers of the heart. _'It plagues me to know your not here.'_ His mind echoed in protest of the search. Weakened physically, he was not to give up without seeing him one last time. _'But... do you want me to find you?'_ Finding it hard not to stop in the tracks of the sand, Clive stood to a still amongst the depths of the desert. This was his kingdom to roam, to find what he was searching for. When this adventure had first started, he believed he wanted to learn about the world. The world taught him though that was something he didn't dare to dream of, his eyes set amongst an angel possessed into the heavens that could never be brought down to his own filthy hands.

"I'm so dirty..." Shaken from the cold of the growing night, he huddled alone close to the fire. _'I made him dirty...' _His lips trembled out the words but dare not enter them aloud into the air, but his breath carried them on. "He's not giving up yet though Clive, you have to keep going." The gunner's eyes grew wide with astonishment. That familiar voice that drew near to him, was it? Looking back he could see his wife, the woman he loved and was torn apart to see here. Both Virginia and Gallows placed to her side. The woman stood with tears in her eyes watching the man she longed loved be out of her own reach. "C-Catherine?" He croaked.

"Love makes you do crazy things... All the way from traveling the world after one person you love to going to their side... Love always shows a way through the darkness... No matter how old you get, that feeling of love bursting through your heart is always the same and most true to you more than yourself. Isn't it funny Clive? I mean, if you gone this far, what is stopping you?" Her words broken yet the feeling of emotion still lingered. 'Love makes you do crazy things, even if that means.... letting go of who you love the most.'

Seeing her like that was like an eternity of hell. What words she shared though had been true. Clive had gone so far just to find Jet on his own, he forgotten who was on his side. Virginia was the first to approach giving the older man a small hug. "You know, I never thought you'd be the one pushing everyone away. We'll always stick by your side no matter what. Remember, love conquers all!" Her grasp softened letting go of him taking a step aside while Gallows approached.

Clumsily he rubbed the side of his head looking to the gunner who looked curious of what he had to say. "Do you have to look at me like that?" He muttered at first. "I'm not good with these sorts of things, but what she said is right. We are by your side no matter what. We've been in plenty of situations and were not sitting alone on this one! All four of us are a team." Cheering, he raised a fist into the air proudly being followed by Virginia in the action. "A team!" She cheered along with him. Taking a side next to Virginia, the two became silent when Catherine came near Clive.

Sadness, joy, hatred, love, all of them being emotions which displayed themselves into her eyes forming the tears crossing her cheeks. Sadness for what she had given up. Joy for what Clive had came to see. Hatred for him being stripped away from her... and love, hoping that Clive and Jet would finally have a new future. Perhaps a better one then theirs. "Clive... I'll always love you, remember that. I'll never hate you for anything you done. I... wish you the best of luck." Brushing her lips onto her she forced herself away in small sobs. "Make sure when your journey is over that you will come visit me. Okay? I'll be waiting, as long as I can breathe... I'll wait for you..." Taking several steps away from the group that had reunited from such a long time, quickly her pace carried into the distance leaving Clive standing there in the cold. "Catherine... Thank you."

_Love does make you do crazy things. It also stings deep inside like a knife when betrayed. To have a blessing though, by someone that loves you... I thank her for that each day I can breathe. I'll thank her for it till I die. I can hold him in my arms believing in no such thing as pain. Always I will carry a part of love for her inside my heart. _

_Catherine, I love you..._

The hardest thing along the journey for Clive was not that very moment. In fact, he didn't learn of it until he heard of rumors about a boy far off in the desert being kept away. Believing it was a lead, he found out more than he had hoped for. Wounds smothered their bodies as the group stood near the cabin after a fierce battle. "Well Clive, you aren't just going to stand there are you?" Virginia teased. Gallows amusedly chuckled pushing Clive ahead, still a little creeped out of the idea of Jet and Clive being forever together, but it was what made them both smile. Never did the small android seem to smile before, so this was for the best. "Yeah, get your lazy can in there!" He ordered. Standing near the edge, the two left Clive to serve his own pathway. Neither of them could assist any longer until they were sure.

Stumbling towards the cabin, Clive found what he hoped and what he feared inside... He hoped for Jet, and feared for the worst. His heart sank into the pit of his stomach seeing the mess motionless upon the bed. Soft fleshed bruised, his body seeming broken against the mattress. "How Jet?" Tears flooded to his eyes. "You're the strongest I know.." Twisting the chains loose from the frail arms, slowly he noticed the angel was awakening within his arm. Poor Clive's heart pounding heavily, but words didn't have a meaning in an encounter like this. His arms wrapped around the cold body trying to bring back the life into him that was lost. Yet, even for a week state that the boy was in, he drew the energy to move close to Clive's warm lips, he himself drawing closer to him letting their lips meet to prove dreams do come true.

_I found you... _

_Even after all this time._

_Jet, you are my stars._

_My hope..._

_My morning light._

_You are..._

_My everything, my love. _

_You are, my story._

To be continued...


	11. The Illness

:The Illness:





It nearly seemed like forever to him. He couldn't bear to part from those violet pale eyes; yet in the end he was forced to as they sunk into a weary sleep. All that night Clive had remained by his bed side. Constantly worrying of the state of his loved one who lay stranded in the bed clinging to life.

His fingers kept running through the soft silver in hopes he would awaken with a new light. Hoping that he could help him if that was possible by this point. Even in the early morning Jet didn't strain to shed his eyes open. There was nothing other than his soft breathing to leave Clive in prayer. By noon, his fear flourished into thorns. Startling over the boy, he shook him trying to wake him. Still, there had been no sign of anything. Inside, a part of him was crumbling to ruins. Almost all hope lost inside his fragile heart.

Helplessly Virginia and Gallows hung by the door way. Their own hearts being shattered by watching the two rot away in the dark depth of the room. Finally, she couldn't take it anymore. Placing a hand on his shoulder Virginia attempted to lure him away from the boy's bed side. She urged him to rest, have something to eat also, but he remained stubborn. Cliff refused it all. The only thing that remained deep in his mind was how it was his fault Jet was like this. It would be his fault if the boy faded away now. Loosely his arms had tied around the smaller one's body.

"You'll wake up soon…"

"_Right…?"_

Not giving up herself, Virginia dragged him away. He was forced to rest weather he wanted to or not. Though he could not remain by Jet's bed, still Clive remained worried for him. Often away from his bed side he would end up pacing back and forth outside. His mind wouldn't stray for even a moment. Staring into the fire was the only thing he could keep his mind focused other things. Unfortunately, as the days grew on, Clive fell deeply ill into depression. His body took the punishment of this fall. Not long after, Clive was in a near lifeless state leaving both Virginia and Gallows to treat the two alone.

For the next for days everyone took shifts to keep watch over Jet. One after another, they treated his wounds. Cleaned him up. Things had begun to turn for the worst for the adventures. Their dreams nearly shattered when Gallows had made a discovery. Time was of the essence now. Bidding a short farewell to Virginia he was off to find a doctor. Four days it took for him to find one. Between the walks from town to town, to trying to track one down and being lead down false paths, they ended rushing back by train.

In shock, he couldn't believe it. He was sitting on a chair near the bed just watching. He had watched for hours. When he needed it the most, help never came. Tears had been flooding down his flushed cheeks ever since he passed on. Hand in hand, it was now too late. Forever he was lost. The doctor stepped foot inside, already catching the feeling by the sad eyes looking up to him. With a jaw gapped Gallows was dumbfounded. "You're awake!" He asked startled.

Silence passed through the room and the soft wind blew his silver bangs away from his eyes. Facing Clive, Jet nodded closing his blood shot eyes. By the looks of it, for the longest time he had been crying. Bandages had covered his torso, neck, and arms, covered in blood and scraps but… not a scratch remained on Clive. It looked like it should have been the other way around. It looked as if Jet should have been the one to lye lifeless in the bed. But, things happen to change sometimes for the worst. Sometimes, they change because of one un-thoughtful action.

"You asshole." Sobbed Jet. His head buried against the cold hand. Tears kept falling from his eyes, and still, Clive was no longer there. No longer there to tell him it was okay. No longer there to smile and pat him on the head or get into small petty arguments over each other's morals. Clive was no longer there to be by his side. All the promised had been washed down the drain. Unfolding his fingers from the cold grasp, Clive's hand limply fell to the bed, and again Jet turned back and took a note off from the bed. His tears still fell, and his lips trembled to read over the words scratched down onto the paper.

'_If only… I was there for you.'_

'_I'm sorry…'_

'_I was too late for you.'_

**Jet's P.o.v:**

_What I learned over my life time is that through out time I shall forever travel this world alone. People come and go everyday. I can even stay with them for a long time however… They can die right in your arms and there is no way you can pull them back to you. Even when your strong… they are forever lost. Love, it's a useless emotion that leaves you hurt inside time after time again. It twists your mind and heart in half sometimes. Sitting here now I laugh at myself of how foolish I was. I see now that there was nothing I could of done to save him. There was nothing I could of done to make things right. There is nothing left for me here but to run… But no matter how fast or far I go, the pain will still linger deep inside my chest, and I'll never be the same. Forever, I'll hold these wounds, till the day I die. And if I have no soul as I am a 'heartless' machine, then let me burn in hell. Let me rot away in these sands to never recall this pain. Let me fall down. Let god tell me why, why does everyone but me die?_

'_Tell me god, why?'_

:Clive's Letter:

For days I sat here restlessly. My heart can not carry on. I sat here watching you for hours seeing everything that I done wrong. I'm sorry my dear Jet. I've done this to you. Forgive me my dear, Jet. I shall pay for this sin. Forgive me. I see what I did wrong. Forgive me. I'm taking myself away from you. Forgive me. I'll forever love you. Till we meet again at those heavenly gates, I shall wait by your side. Day by day, I'll be here just as loyal. Just don't stop smiling dear, Jet. For you are my stars and my sun on a cloudy day. You are my everything dear Jet, even as lye here in pain. You are my everything Jet, that's why I die here today.

Forever Yours,

Clive



::



:Author's Note:

Enough people have bugged me to continue this fan fiction, so I wrote a short. Yes, it leaves many things open, but to let you all know it is not over yet. So keep in tune to find out what happens next! I shall be hopefully updating more.

Inspired by: **Kid Rock**- Only god knows why

Lyrics:

I've been gone I've been gone for way to long  
Maybe I forgot all the things I'd miss  
Oh somehow I know there's more to life then this  
I said it too many times and I still stand firm  
You get what you put in, and people get what deserve  
Still I ain't seen mine no I ain't seen mine  
I've been givin' just ain't been gettin' I've been walkin back that line  
So I think ill keep on walkin with my head held high  
Ill keep movin' on and only God knows why

 **To be continued**…


	12. Over the Passes

**((Author's comments: **Oh boy, with so many comments asking me to continue, I finally sat down and did so. Of course you all know I forgotten about this fic, but it's now back. So cheer or make a muck! Yes, I am distracting you from the story for a bit longer til… Till now! Happy readings.

**:Over the Passes:**

The day after the funeral; there had been not much left to say. What could anyone tell me that I hadn't already known? Sorry never brought a person back from the grave. Those words of an apology rather crush me again. As I look back to this story, to this day I regret the feeling I permitted my self to have. A year has passed since that incident and still I feel alone as ever. Clive was gone. Never again could I get pissed at him for the logic he threw out to me, no longer could I insult, ignore, or… love? It took me a week to fully accept the facts of life. Don't get me wrong though, I still grieve over my loss this day. Me, I still stand here waiting for the day to come where I can fall to the eternal rest. I never came close to my goal. Always fate stepped in the way. Today, it would be called exactly one year since then. A mark of an anniversary where I had lost one thing important to me. The grave stood tall against the edge of the world, or that would be its name for me. Where the fire flies sprung each night blessing the sky with their short filled light until they died. There beauty seemed to grow each and every day, where I wanted to die but could never find the way… Iron never had a heart, so why could I feel this? Am I flesh, or am I blood? An android with no true identity, for I Jet am artificial. Created, destroyed, and still undefined for my true purpose. I walk this hollow earth alone. One day perhaps, I will find my rest and haven in the one word which the world desired. Perhaps, one day I would find my meaning in this devastating world. All I can think now is _Eden._

One year could be a drop in a puddle, the puddle forming hundreds of years. With an artificial body, who was to say he wouldn't last that long? He didn't even know his age let alone his true name. Was Jet to wonder the rest of his days around this dead planet? The sands of time were the cruelest being amongst this dead rock called a planet. Time was the one thing he would never catch up to, no matter how fast he could run. Jet knew this, and someday, he would be completely alone in this world.

"Your daughter is growing up so quickly." The false smile told stone. "She's growing up to be just like you now. She wants to do research and well, you should see her always reading…" Three months ago that had been. That day he left a photo of his child for the grave. All by her self, the child taught her self to read and was becoming quiet educated like her father. Jet sometimes became too afraid to visit the humble home that greeted him. The terrains of the dessert were the only home he had ever known. If it were not for him, Clive would still be alive with his family and friends. He would be enjoying the rest of his days in his home and love. Jet would always regret what he had done. Misery propped to his heart tainting it with bitterness. Sorrow plagued him and misfortune buried his foot steps. Today was the day of an anniversary. It was the day of remembrance and where Jet had went to the grave. Though, along the way he paused stopping from his travels. Along the way to the grave he found something to be disturbed by or to fill with joy.

The grave was empty, dug out by days ago. Grave robbers could have done this, but little hope rested into thus. Jet smiled walking closer to the burial ground. From beneath his clothing he pulled out a rare white flower tossing it down into the earth. With the nudge of his foot it covered with the filth of the earth.

"_To years to come, dear Clive. Take this gift and remember me. Someday we will meet up again…"_

**(To be continued!)**


	13. My Misfortune

**Author's note: **Well, both on aim, e-mail, and so on; people have been pestering me about this fic. It is taking a turn for who knows where but I am glad you are all enjoying it. I am sorry for the writer's block you all had to endure, yet now I can construct more thrillers for you to enjoy.  Happy readings:

:My Misfortune:

How did I get myself into this? My body feels so numb, the only thing I can see now is that blinding light above. There are voices that angrily hiss to my, perhaps demons from below? And shadows slipping to the sides, but my head refrained from straying from fears of how I died. From the corner of my vision my eyes trained to these shadows. No details were defined, just the pure darkness which they held. Those shadows reached out to me grabbing my body when I could hardly breathe. It was not like I could struggle for cold metal contained me.

And yet, so many questions were left to ashes and dust.

For one why did they bring me back to this hell I can not take?

Eventually I broke away from their clutches, breaking away my bonds. Every single damn shadow that touched me now rested in their unholy graves. In horror I witnessed my new being; no longer real blood as everyone could see. Parts of my dead flesh had been restored. How could this be; I couldn't help but think what they done to me. I was composed of metal and flesh, a sickening thing to see. Stitches and wires covered beneath the sea of my real or fake skin.

The longer I stared, the more nauseated I became. My reflection made me weary where I couldn't stand my pain. How could anyone ever look to me now when they witnessed death take its part in me? I, Clive, was an abomination of this world and there was no way for me to run.

Before I was fortunate that death took its role. To deliver me away from this suffering left by humanity death paid me that favor. Dancing with death always returned in full and so today I pay the price. Now composed of metals with wires for my blood; I'll keep living like this till the day this world ceases to exist.

With this curse came a blessing as well. Strength forged through my body, perhaps invincible if I pleased. Agility had been another yet what good had it served for a man as me? Forever I could stare to the graves in which I had dug for those damn wretched humans who did the opposite for me.

The procedures of this operation slicked through my mind. Each time I rethought it, tears brought to my eyes. Oh how I cried in pain when those shadows moved forth; they ripped me apart alive or maybe dead. The situation in my mind never changed pace. The cruelty of man locked away to these tombs. Never would I speak of these horrors that I endured but… it brought to mind one thing I over looked. That thought brought pain.

One hope kept inside the walls of my heart; at the same time draining out the little joy I had left. I recalled an angel, or more of a love. Those soft violet eyes and silver smooth creamy skin; had he suffered too? I told him many times it did not matter what he was. These people did unspeakable things to him too. He wouldn't cry for himself; never did I take part and watch him sob. Now that I remember and tested through those crimes; I realized how much that boy hurt deep down inside. Not only had they done him in with pain, but I too by robbing his heart away.

What day was it? How long have I been buried down in the ditches? Where am I? Where is he?

Wherever my angel roams I shall follow in those footsteps in hopes. Despite my new form, maybe he still loves me. We will be both immortal forever, I promise my dear Jet. The next time I die, we will be together for the rest of time.

(To be continued…)


	14. Hope Dangles

**Author's notes: **To become inspired for this story again; I had gotten my boyfriend to write the first half of a chapter. As you can tell; he is remarkably literate although he denies all signs that he is. Silly him; right? I'm afraid to notify you that this fan fiction is drawing to an end. Although; I'm sure I'll ask Hsiu again to help me with the last chapter. Enough about me and my babbling that pisses you all off! Now; let's move onto the story!

Jet's P.o.V.

_I no longer visited the empty grave. I knew the flower I had left had withered as quickly as anything else that touched the barren earth. The body was gone with no messenger behind it. With the future so uncertain and the faint pang of hope still resting upon me, I left the empty grave; Clive was not there anymore. ___

_So went my life of waiting._

Padding through the desert sands, ignoring the bite of the sandy wind, Jet drifted away from the lonely grave. Waiting had left him stir crazy and seeking after treasures was the best way to conflict the symptoms. The creatures of the sand were getting restless, as long as the town was willing to pay Jet would keep them out of harms way. Resting atop a dune, he sat leaning back on his hands in disappointment. The sun warmed sands sifted over his fingers as the light of the setting sun cast warm hues on the ground. 

Another day, another bundle of cash, but still no glimpse of the kind face that invited him before. 'Clive' he whispered into the wind, his call lost upon the vast emptiness of the desert. 

_Maybe you've forgotten about me_

Anxiety ate at his heart. Jet tugged the scarves tighter around his neck then held his forehead between his hands. Mechanical. He was guilty of forgetting his own past. What if Clive was to be the same?

_You aren't in the grave anymore, so where are you? Clive, you're always looking out for other people so who's going to look out for you?_

Distraught, Jet looked for his answers on the horizon line. Faintly there was an abrupt break in the even slopes of sand. Curious as to who would be traveling out alone in the barren desert, Jet stood up and shaded his eyes with a hand to get a better glimpse. But after a blink, the figure totally disappeared from view. 

The moment temporarily made him forget his surroundings as he felt his heart drop. He didn't even notice the massive dog couching at ready behind him. Sandy colored to blend with the terrain, the wild eyed dog leapt upon the boys back looking to make a meal of him. Unexpectedly, Jet was knocked over, face-first into the sand. The disappointment and misery he had felt before vanished instantaneously in the heat of the attack. The animal's movement was scattered as it repeatedly attacked its unarmed prey, finally sinking its powerful jaws into Jet's shoulder. Its sharpened claws dug mercilessly into Jet's body. All the while the boy winced but would not scream nor cry out and continued to try and beat off the animal with his good arm while scrambling towards his weapon laying idly in the sand.

A gunshot rang out and the struggle hastily stopped. It was a clean shot; a circular hole appeared on one side of the dogs head and ended on the other. Its body toppled to one side as Jet scrambled up to see who was his savior at the peek hours of the devastating heat.

That figure had appeared on the horizon again raising the interest of the man. Amongst the terrains of this world; many had not provided a helping hand even when death would become present to those in distress. So this came as a surprise that one from the distance had spared his life. What form of man however could have the skill of accuracy, trusting they would not hit him in the process of saving? Again however, there was an equal share of a bounty hunter looking for the mere pricing upon his head.

Since then… that was what Jet had allowed his struggles to become; a boy who cared of nothing more than wealth. He needed to disconnect emotions from the days of suffering; to become something new rather than a sitting duck. Once, he had forgotten and lost everything; in order to survive; and survival was the only choice left.

Fresh blood ran down from the inflicted injuries; drawing the deserved attention away from the figure that resulted to far for his observations. He was tired, restless, and past the fine line of fear. Those boarders having been knocked down before was stressful enough alone; but again those delicate boarders were shattered leaving what little security left broken.

_Hope…dangles on a string,_

_Like slow spinning redemption, Winding in and winding out_

_The shine of it has caught my eye, And roped me in _

_So mesmerizing, so hypnotizing  
I am captivated, I am_

_**Vindicated**_

_  
I am selfish  
I am wrong  
I am right  
I swear I'm right  
Swear I knew it all along  
And I am flawed, but I am cleaning up so well  
I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself_

No longer was Jet alone. There was someone there standing over him; protecting him no only from the heat of the sun but from whatever would come his way. No promises were made or stated; but the feeling was mutual. His bright violet eyes turned upwards to the once distant figure finding peace within. Safely he could say that the painful memories could finally be put behind him.

_So clear…_

_Like the diamond in your ring_

_Cut to mirror your intention_

_Oversized and overwhelmed_

_  
The shine of which has caught my eye_

It was the moment of truth that he had long awaited for. From the months; never did he dream that this day would come… though; now that he was standing here at the ending; he could say that the impossible was never out of reach.

_  
And rendered me  
So isolated , and so motivated  
I am certain now that I am_

The large metal instrument, in which his hero carried, dropped to the sand creating a cluster of dry dust to spread to the air. The slight wind hushing across his cheeks; brushing his hair to every whim it pleased; the glow of the light across his sun kissed face; he looked to much as an angel to be real.

_So turn  
Up the corners of your lips  
Part them and feel my finger tips  
Trace the moment, fall forever_

_  
Defense is paper thin  
Just one touch and I'll be in  
Too deep now to ever swim against the current  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip against the current  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip away_

My hope  
dangles on a string  
Like slow spinning redemption...

"_Clive…"_

_-_

**Author's Notes: **It was meant to be longer; but for now this is all there is for this chapter. I hope you all enjoyed it.


	15. The Destination

**Author's P.o.v.**

Bringing back the come back of this abandoned fan fiction is a twist. From retirement to back on the stand of writing, I do hope my fans are still alive. No spoilers here so go on and read you lazy bums!

The Destination

'_Every story has its beginning.'_

So we tell ourselves.

'_It is up to the beholder to decide when it is to end. Just like every flying leap of fate, my story is shyly drawing to its closure._

_---_

'_For now however, it is far from over. In fact, this may be considered the start of my tale. I can not begin to describe the outcome of my own befallen nature, but… it began something like this, those some odd years ago.'_

Hope was just beyond my limitations. There was no promise of success and still I carried on hopeful angel wings. Caressed in the sweet nurturing desires that raged on for months, the impossible structures that once seemed to be overbearing walls once had came plummeting downwards to the earth's soil, making what dreams I had come true. As I stood speechless knee deep in the sands, all I could manage was to gawk in hope. Posses the memories of hope… and the chance of finally feeling at home. Has he returned to me, or was this a boyish fantasy? Perhaps another mirage forcing the last bit of my sanity to run dry.

Heavily the ached pain bit deep away at my abdomen, like a bull defeating a rival carrying a red spear to victory. The shameful defeat was a small token to pay to catch that one glimpse. It was enough to say to make me feel fulfilled for the first time in a long time. Failed by my own body, I curled into the patterns of blood that had begun to stain the promising sands that aided my journey so many times before. Soothing warmth compared to chills that crept across my spine lulled me to another state… of shock.

"And here I was to think that you would be impossible to find. You have proved me wrong again, have you not? Yet, there won't be much time for you to gloat within your victory this time. Pray for yourself, you are going to pay for what you have done to me."

A spiral of dust caught into the air, blinding the predator before they may strike. Slinking away with an aggressive struggle bent over survival, Jet passed his way down the mound of dust to freedom. Not far off from the surroundings was the false sense of security. As said, it was better than none. Leading fast upon his trail followed the stray bullets and explosions. Each barely being evaded, but thanks to his own personal skill and the built in system he had been blessed with, he continued on with minimum damage. Short of the single wound inflicted by the first bounding shot.

"You can not run forever… Although you may try." Hoisting the heavy artillery over his shoulder, carefully he took aim. A precise shot could bring down his prey simply… and yet, it changed to overcome above the youth's head. _'Coward…. Why do you not face him? What do you fear, rejection? If you insist on like that… we will take his life. It would be so easy. Would it not? Let's do it now.' _

To much has been lost over a short period of time, and it began to affect him. There were limits to every expectation that one could pass by. Even for the advances of technology, one little wound could become a troublesome pain if and when left alone. Above hailed the scorching son, but no such sweat brought to his body; and so the heat collected as a burden.

Swaggering his way behind the cool shelter provided by recent disasters, Jet positioned inside the abandoned train booth. Turned over and left with so many untouched treasures, it would be a gold mind to many wanders across the desert lands. Countless bodies had been left to rest, the riches still connected to their rotted flesh. Once, the glitter would be satisfying enough to find… but in pursuit of a familiar, what little did matter? Bound to the years left in tack, Jet was well aware of his endless future to come. There would be one day he alone would watch the world end and it could not be here. It was those days in mind would be in question…

Patiently, Jet concealed himself in the rows of seats, after adjusting the bodies to help his cover. The wound left unattended in the hours of spare time had grown calm, much like the peaceful state he had began to encounter. Night had arisen setting him into the deep slumber he had longed for. The worries breezed over his silver locks, and the violet eyes sealed shut.

--

Casually, he brushed the snow from his shoulders.

"This was least expected." Mocked by his smile as he inspected the sky. Lazily the glasses slipped downward from his nose, but… an inspiring site that has yet to be seen could not keep him from much care. It was a shame he was to do so alone. Resting his weapon against the arch of metal, quietly he crept his way inward of the metal shaft graveyard.

'_Finish him off.'_

Removing the clutter from the cart, he made his way to the boy shifting his body some to rest in his arms. He was careful not to stir him from his well needed rest. This moment, the hunter had dreamed about for so long on his search… but nothing as it had been. Just as he remembered, he was soft and warm. So sweet to hold between his arms again, but it could not last forever. "I can not look after you for so long. I wish I could, but there is too much to risk. If you woke up now I wouldn't want to ever let you go again but…"

"_What are you waiting for! You are a warrior! Slaughter him now!"_

Closing his eyes, Clive rested his chin on the boy's head. Green messy bangs hung over his face, unkept for sometime now. Tighter his arms wrapped around the limp body in his arms, fearing that if he did let go, he would lose him again.

'_He holds you back! Have you gone mad? Kill him!"_

But, Clive could not contain the motives that persisted inside his mind. There was worse to fear in this world than losing this young boy. Sprung up to his feet, he clutched his own head in denial trying again to surpass the constant annoyance plaguing him. Within this self inward war, so far he had been on the ties of the loosing side… and it would seem it would continue onward until his own end.

"I can't do it!" He hissed in pain.

Pained to escape from the eased sleep, Jet's eyes had pulled back… to find the hunter; he had been forced to seek shelter from, to be right at his feet but… "Clive." He fearfully asked. Not knowing exactly had afflicted the hunter into suffering. Driving his weary state into dormancy for the time being, he raced to the man's side in worry. Had he been hurt, or was he ill? "Clive!" He nearly sang out again, to see in all glory that the man thought to be dead was standing before him living and breathing. Flung back by an angry fist, the boy's head smacked against the window bringing him back down.

"Stay away from me!" Had cried the strong man, now drawn weak in horror. "Leave me alone! I don't want to hurt you!"

'_Kill him now! Everything you have done has been waiting for this opportunity! Do it!'_

"It's… not you, is it?" Jet watched the former man struggle with the inner torment. "What happened to you? You are not who I remember, are you even him? Clive…. I…" Pacing in his own anguish, Jet had risen from his seat… "Please… don't." He begged as he approached again. Clive swung out again, but missed. Given the chance Jet caught him in his arms, tightly holding him.

"Let go of me you asshole! I'll kill you!"

"…"

"I'll rip you apart limb from limb!"

No matter how hard he struggled to free himself, Jet refused to let go.

He slid down against the wall with the man he so feared, holding him tightly as if to never let go. Seizing the moment, Jet grew back into the calm state as before. Each touch, violent shake and push, reopened the dark wound.

"I'm hurting you…. Make me stop!"

In the dull dark, Jet drew a smile down at his friend of so long ago. His grip loosened from exhaustion, not fearing what was to come. Cold nipped to his finger tips; his feet and hands growing quickly numb. But, even in the greatest slowing moments of pain there was peace set around him in this dingy dungeon.

Silence broke through.

Clive had quieted himself and lay weeping against the youth's shoulder. Words were short from his tongue, forming an unknown language that he could not speak. Frightful of his own destruction he had caused, Clive coward away against the boy's weak arms.

"Forgive me…."

:To be Continuted:


End file.
